Homeownership is the American Dream… I can picture it now,
Don Draper making his pitch to the collaborative team of property builders, mortgage lenders, real estate agents and politicians, and the buzz of excitement
that follows. Eureka! They’ve found the
way to convince millions of people to enslave themselves to a lifetime of
mortgage payments, yard work, improvement projects, and uninspiring careers,
all in the name of living the dream.
As a homeowner for the past 10 years, I’ve
experienced a gamut of emotions from the gratifying completion of a DIY project
to hoping to return home to a pile of ashes. This responsibility is not for
everyone, and apparently I’m in that group since I can count at least 20 things
I’d rather be doing on the weekends than mowing the lawn or cleaning the
house. But, admittedly, this money pit
has taught us a few lessons over the past decade, some that had apparently
needed to be learned the hard way.
Don’t make hasty decisions/Think
before you act…
It was early 2003 and the real estate market was just
starting to explode. My cohabitant and I was on our second apartment, and
started to listen to the chatter about wasting money on rent and great tax
breaks on mortgages, so we decided that we’d plan to buy at the end of our lease. Besides, if we
didn’t buy now, we’d never be able to afford a home… I was “fortunate” to have a brother in the mortgage industry, so the pre-approval was seamless. I immediately started scouring online databases for homes in our price range, and my dream of a quaint row house in Alexandria was soon crushed. I really wanted a dog, so had ruled out condos in lieu of a little green space, but was still able to still keep us “around” the Beltway. Then my darling partner declared that he needed a garage, so the search spread further west and south. Stafford, VA was on our radar, although it was 40 miles from work, we had friends in the area and we could buy a single family dwelling for the price of a townhouse up the road, which was important because if we didn’t buy one now, we’d never be able to afford a home…
We met with a realtor and gave him our wish list, which was basically a garage, 3-bedrooms, backyard, and unfinished basement (you know, for the future bar). During my search of the area, I had come across a deal that seemed too good to be true, a 3-bedroom brick-front colonial on 1/3 acre with an unfinished basement, and the kicker, a full front porch. This house was not only in our price range, but had been on the market for a couple of months, which was uncommon during this frenzy, so I was intrigued (and a bit fixated). We soon learned that the property had been a rental and didn’t show well (aka pig sty), but my focus was on its potential and the neighborhood didn’t have an HOA, which was important since I was moving in with a cowboy. After some negotiation, the paperwork was signed within six days of our first viewing and I spent the next few months chewing on antacids, telling myself that “if we didn’t buy now, we’d never be able to afford a home…”
If it’s too good to
be true, it probably is/Don’t count your chickens before they are hatched
We’re rich! The housing market exploded, buyers are paying
$40K-$50k more than the asking price, and homes are sold within hours of
listing. Our house value had increased almost 50% in two years, so it “made
sense” to take out a home equity loan since we had some credit cards bills and
home improvements to finish. We had plans to join our friends in GA after I
finished grad school, so the loan would be paid off with the house sale and
we’d still have enough for a down payment, since the prices would continue to
soar. Then the market began to retract,
houses were moving slower and the prices soon followed, and then the National
Bureau of Economic Research made the “surprise” announcement that the country
was in a recession. We were stuck, this
property that was once our golden egg, was now not even worth the balance of
the first mortgage.
When life hands you
lemons, make lemonade…
The woe-is-me’ing was in full effect. I was commuting 3
hours a day to pay for a house that I didn’t want and bills for forgotten
purchases, I truly felt like I was in debtor’s prison. So I did what any
desolate person would do, I picked up a homebrew kit. Beer had been a long time
passion of mine (majority of my college papers were on the Boston Beer
Company), but had slackened over the years, mainly due to my discovery of the
quick mind numbing effects of wine. This
new hobby invigorated the both of us; we quickly connected with the homebrew
and craft beer communities, met new friends and started to develop a positive view of
our surroundings. Our house had a new purpose, the garage was cleared for the
brewing equipment, kitchen became central command, dining room was the turned
into the barrel aging room, and fermenting vessels lined the walls of the
“formal” living room.
I finished my first 5K around the time of our second batch
of beer, and immediately had my sights on a half-marathon. As my training progressed, I was pleased to
find enough connecting neighborhoods to keep me off the main roads, and reluctantly
found myself admitting the benefits of the exurbs. As our cycling skills and
confidence increased, discovering that we had access to dozens of miles of
rural country roads from our neighborhood was also a huge bonus, especially
since the hubby set his focus on
becoming an Iron Man and 60+ mile rides were a weekly occurrence.
Life is 10% of what
happens and 90% of how you react/ Regardless of situation, life goes on
In the past ten years, I’ve learned to stop fretting over
the unfinished home projects, relax in traffic and use the time to catch up on
podcasts, and focus on being appreciative of what I have. This does not mean I’ve surrendered the dream
of moving on, but I now see our house as the universe’s way of grounding us,
until we are ready for our next big move.
Since our plans to move to GA,
we’ve been drawn to the localvore culture of Portland, OR, bohemian streets of
Austin, TX, and Blue Ridge backdrop of western VA, so maybe our next home will
be on wheels…
